A bitter pill to swallow

For the past week, I've been struggling to give Jake and Lucy pills for being sick. It seems they came down with something over the holiday timeframe, and mostly, Jake but more recently, Lucy, has been sneezing and wheezing and acting a bit under the weather. We really don't go anywhere, so I'm thinking that perhaps that Jake (since Lucy seems to have caught whatever it is from him) must've put his nose or mouth on the vet's floor when they were in to have their nails trimmed. It was shortly after that time that I noticed symptoms in Jake.

And have you ever had to give a dog a pill?

Well, the vet gave me these huge liver flavored tablets for them to try. "Dogs just love these," the vet said, "They should take them really well." So off home we went. And yes, day one, that first dog treat tablet went down with a fast "Smack, chump, gulp!" and I breathed a sigh of relief as Scott and I headed off to a conference for the VFW and Ladies Auxiliary in Indianapolis. My friend, Sue Anne, was going to watch the dogs while we were away.

A day and a half later, we arrived home late Saturday night to find two happy dogs greeting us with wagging tails and excitement, a note from Sue Anne letting us know that the first pills had gone down well but the second time she tried it, no such luck.  I read the note, then glanced down at the pups, noticing little bits of broken liver pill tablet smeared and busted on the floor. Oh here, we go, I thought.

So I got out a piece of cheese, smushed some busted pill in it, and gave it to Jake. He eagerly took the cheese, swallowed the bits of orange creamy delight and then "Spffft" dropped the remnant of the liver tablet on the floor. He then looked at me as if to say, "Yeah, the cheese is good but I don't like that liver pill and here is what I'm doing with it, blech!"  So, I grabbed the remnant and attempted to force him to swallow it, holding his little doggy chin and prying my finger behind the tab fragment down his throat. It went down, but it took a few tries and neither of us enjoyed the barbaric drama.

Next morning, a whole large fresh liver tablet awaited us. And Lucy was showing symptoms, so she too would get in on the "fun." Over the next three days, I tried many things. I broke the pill up, I ground the pill down, covered it with cheese, nuked it in the microwaved and served it up; this worked for one day. Both dogs chewed it up, but the second day of trying, no, they had figured me out. So, I tried cooking and serving the pills in chorizo, and that worked. But how healthy is that for the dog?

I called the vet and explained what was going on, and asking if they had liquid medicine instead. "No, we don't," she said, "Well, couldn't you just give them chorizo every day with their pill?" Well, I supposed I could, but it's wrong on so many levels, not to mention a pain to cater to the discerning dog palette. And then the secretary suggested I try peanut butter. "My dogs love those liver-flavored tablets," she exclaimed, "But I have big dogs." 

I looked at my small dogs and noticed they were listening in on my conversation with the vet. Good thing they didn't hear her tell me about the peanut butter. As the dogs watched, I went through the pill crushing ritual, retrieved the not often used jar of peanut butter from the cupboard and smeared the pill remnants thoroughly, then placed two wee dishes on the floor. Both dogs sniffed and went for the peanut butter, smacking in the gooey thickness, and for the most part, it went down. Then to the water bowl.

The following day, the peanut butter "trick" didn't work. So, in frustration, I went back to chorizo. This time, they turned their noses up at the chorizo. "Something about it just doesn't smell right," Jake said with his eyes as he got bored quickly with the dish, and walked away to go lie down on his dog pillow. Lucy sniffed and walked away too. No go. So there sat the chorizo bowl most of the day, growing hard and ugly in the wee dish on the kitchen floor with wasted liver tablets in it.

Not wanting to force their little mouths open, especially with Lucy, since her tiny flat mouth makes it nearly impossible to do that, and I didn't want to hurt them besides. Hurting them to get them well; there's an irony in there that I just don't want to deal with. So, I got out a piece of Virginia ham lunchmeat from the fridge and put bits of pill in a piece, and to my surprise, Jake swallowed it easily! Then another! Then another! In four sections, the pill was gone! And, the floor was clean, so Jake did not spit it out this time! Lucy would not play this game. So with her, I went back to the cheese trick, which somewhat worked. She got some cheese pill down.

The next day, I got out the lunchmeat, and guess what? Jake ate the lunchmeat but spit the pill on the floor. I tried again; same results. Same input, same output. And Lucy didn't go near the bowl with nuked cheese. So, what now? I guess I'll have to try ice cream tomorrow. Yes, that's it; that's the ticket: Who would turn down liver-flavored vanilla ice cream?  (: